Pull Me Out of the Darkness
by JaeCurtis
Summary: Is love enough to conquer all? Will Michael and Nikita find each other again?
1. Chapter 1

Introduction:

It's been exactly a year since she had walked away and left behind the people she loves the most. It's been a year since she left the man she loves; her soul mate, the man who promised to give her a life out of the darkness. She remembers it like it was just yesterday. She, Michael and the rest of the group were standing in the middle of the floor of their new hideout. She remembers every word that escaped their mouths, every plans to clear her name, and their encouraging words of comfort. She remembers how she looked right into Michael's eyes. In his eyes she saw hope, unconditional love and at the same time fear. Fear of losing the woman he loves. "'Til death do us part, right?" he said, giving her an assuring smile. Then he hugged her, not knowing that it would be the last time he'll ever wrap around his arms around her. While the rest of them discussed their plans and options, without any of them noticing, Nikita quickly and quietly climbed the stairs. She did not say goodbye, nor turn her head to take a last look at them, because she knew that if she did, she would not be able to drag her feet out of there. She began sobbing as she ascended the stairs, then against her will, she removed the thing that meant the world to her: her engagement ring.

Chapter 1.

"Michael, have you-" Birkhoff stopped without finishing his sentence.

He sees Michael standing in his room, looking out the window and with a glass full of scotch in his hand.  
Michael was so lost in his thought that he did not even hear Birkhoff's unfinished question nor him entering his room.

"Ehem! Is everything okay with you, Mikey?" Birkhoff asked.

Suddenly Michael snapped back to reality and turns his head, "Oh, hey there. Sorry, I didn't hear you come in," he said, putting on a fake smile. "What's up?"

"I think we may have a location."

Michael's eyes widened. He could barely understand what Birkoff said. "You..?" he says, rubbing his eyes with his hand, "..a location?" he asked, visibly shaken.

"MAY have a location. Don't get your hopes up too high, Mikey. We're not 100% sure yet."

He slowly turned his back from Birkhoff and slowly opened the drawer of the nightstand next to his bed. He opened the tiny box and slowly picked up the engagement ring he had given to Nikita. He sat on the edge of the bed, still holding the ring between his thumb and index finger.

"We're almost there, Birkhoff. We're too close I can feel her. "

"We will be together again soon, Nikita. Please come back to me..

FLASHBACK

It's been 3 weeks now since Michael got his new hand. And it's been a while since he and Nikita had shared an intimate moment together. Ever since he lost his hand, he has been distant and living in his own little world, pushing Nikita away. But tonight, he realized how insensitive and selfish he has been. He unlocked the backdoor of the house he shares with Nikita. He opened the door quietly and took a quick peek at the large kitchen. A kitchen so beautiful but yet, nobody ever uses. He saw Nikita standing in front of the sink. She was holding a plate on one hand, and a towel on the other. She was lost in thought, not even hearing the door open, or Michael closing in. Then, without any warning, Michael grabbed her waist from behind, pulling it closer to him with one hand, and turned her head towards his with his other hand. He looked at her deeply and pressed his lips into hers. Nikita did not even have the time to process what was happening. She just automatically returned his kiss. They kissed so passionately. Their tongues dancing and their bodies craving for each other's touch. Then Michael turned Nikita's body completely, and carried her to the dining table where they began undressing each other. Michael took a moment to stare at Nikita. "God, you are beautiful. And I've missed you..so much!," he said. Then he grabbed her hips and entered her at full length. Nikita screamed when she felt his hard penis. She grabbed his buttocks to pull him closer so he could penetrate deeper and harder. "Ahh, Mi..Michaeeel! Ahh, I'm almost there! Harder! Fasterrr!" Hearing Nikita's moans and pleads made him even more aroused. He continued thrusting harder and deeper into her. "Oh, fuck! Uhmm, ahh, Michael!" Nikita's breathing heavily and Micheal knew that she has reached her climax. He continued thrusting and within seconds, "Nikitaaaa! Fuck! You're so good! So good! Fuck!" Michael collapsed on top of Nikita. Their breathing both heavy, and they were about to doze off to sleep when Michael suddenly gathered up all his strength and scooped up Nikita. He carried her into the bedroom, where they made love over and over again that night.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

**_And in the dark, I can hear your heart beat_**  
**_I tried to find the sound_**  
**_But then it stopped and I was in the darkness_**  
**_So darkness I became_**

Nikita settled in a small island in Hawaii. She was once assigned in this island for a mission 7 years ago while she was still in Division. She had to follow a target who was vacationing with his family. She knows that this place is quiet, and far from all the craziness of the world. She knows that people here would not recognize her. She loves the simplicity, the calmness and the remoteness of this place.

To protect her identity, Nikita had to change her look. She had cut her hair shorter, similar to Josephine's look. People here know her as "Margaret" and she managed to get herself a job at the nearby bar as a waitress. It's been a year and everything has been great: no one has recognized her, or has she ever bumped into anyone she knows or knew from her previous missions. So far, things have been great.

She managed to get a small apartment. The apartment itself is small but functional. It is lacking decors and only had a few furniture. It only has a couch, dining table and a bed. It almost looks like a bachelor pad. If anyone ever walks in, no one would ever suspect that a woman lives there. She couldn't help but miss the home she shared with Michael. She couldn't help but miss the comfy couch, where she and Michael used to sit late at night watching movies; the dining room where they shared many stories, laughs and wonderful meals together; and the bedroom, where she and Michael made love every night. God, she misses her home. She misses Michael. She misses his laughs, his tight embrace, his kisses and the way he touches and makes love to her. She misses everything about him. She closes her eyes and touches her lips, trying to remember the last time his lips were on hers. She lays down on the bed and tries to relive the last time, last night, they made love. The way he touched her, kissed her, and whispered in her ear how much he loved her, and how he promised that things will be okay. She grabs her left hand and caresses her naked ring finger, suddenly feeling pain, as if she's been stabbed in the heart.

"Michael, forgive me. Please forgive me. I love you. You're just better off without me. You deserve so much more," she says sobbing.

xxx

"Margaret, I need you to take care of Table 6," says Lacey, the bar manager.

"Okay." she replies, gathering a pen and a piece of paper.

A gentleman is reading his book. He was born and raised in this island but moved to California a few years ago to pursue a career in the medical field.

"Goodmorning. My name is Margaret. Are you ready to order?" Nikita asks with a smile.

"Oh, hi there. Uhm. Yes, I'll have coffee and some blueberry pancakes."

"Okay. Got it. I'll be back in a few minutes."

The gentleman can't help but look at Nikita. He doesn't know exactly what it is, but he seems to be drawn to her. He can't explain why but he instantly feels a strong connection and attraction to Nikita.

A few minutes later..

"Okay, I've got your pancakes, your coffee, and the syrup is right there, to your left."

"Thanks."

As Nikita prepares to walk away, the gentleman stops her.

"Uhm, I know this may be a little straight forward considering we just met not even half an hour ago, but is it okay if I get your number?"

Nikita stares at him, speechless.

"Ah..um..Don't take this the wrong way but I'm just here to work and make some money, that's all. I'm not interested in meeting anyone," she says, with a hint of irritation in her voice.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to sound so arrogant and abnoxious. I hope you're not upset."

"It's okay. And don't worry, I'm not."

With that, they both went their separate ways. The gentleman finished his food and left without saying another word, and Nikita, well, she stayed inside the locker room during her break and just thought about Michael. Somehow, that little interaction she had earlier made her heart ache. All she wanted to do at that very moment was to hug Michael, see him, and kiss him. But she knew she couldn't. She knew that whatever she had with Michael, she'll never have again. That all she could ever do is think about him, and dream about the life they wanted to build together.


	3. Chapter 3

_**You know we can get away**_  
_**Because I'm calling your name**_  
_**Every day I feel this pain**_  
_**But you just turn and walk away**_

"Mikey! Mikey!" yells Birkhoff, running down to stairs to catch up with Michael. "Yo! Where are you going?"

Michael opens the trunk of his SUV and throws his bags in. "Where do you think I'm going?"

"No, no, no, Mikey. Please tell me you're not going to Hawaii?"

"Why not? Nikita's there. I need to get her back!" he says angrily.

"Look, Mikey, I know you want her back. We all do. But we're not even sure she's there."

"I don't give a damn! I'm willing to take a chance. "

"But Michael, she left for a reason. And even if you go to Hawaii, you won't be able to find her. You know Nikki."

"Yes, I know Nikita. I know her better than anyone. I am the only one who can find her. I've done it before, remember? I was the one who found her when she went rogue."

Birkhoff tries to argue but before he even gets the chance to say anything, Michael jumps in his SUV and speeds off.

xxx

Nikita wakes up early in the morning, and she automatically reaches to the right side of the bed, the side Michael slept in when they were together. She reaches with her eyes still shut and for some weird reason she forgets that she is thousands of miles away from home; from Michael. The minute her hand feels the empty bed, her eyes immediately open, suddenly realizes that she is indeed alone. She sits up and grabs a pillow, and she hugs it tightly. Her tears slowly falling on her cheeks, and her heart is breaking once more into million little pieces.

"Michael, I miss you. Please forgive me," she says while sobbing uncontrollably.

xxx

Nikita walks barefoot on the beach. She doesn't work on weekends so she thought it would be a good way to get her mind off things if she took a walk. She walks quietly along the shore. She is so deep in thought that she doesn't even hear someone come up behind her.

"Hey, goodmorning," the stranger says.

Nikita turns her head towards the familiar voice. "Oh, hey. What are you doing here?"

"My house is just right there," he says pointing to the direction behind Nikita.

"Listen, Margaret, ab-" he is quickly interrupted.

"How'd you know my name?" she asks with confusion.

"I read your name tag the other day." he says smiling.

"Oh, right. Sorry," suddenly feeling stupid.

"No worries. So as I was saying, about the other day, I hope I didn't upset you. And I hope I didn't leave a bad first impression."

"Oh, no, you didn't. I didn't mean to sound rude or anything. It's just that I didn't expect it. You kind of threw me off guard, that's all."

"I know. I'm sorry. By the way, my name is Jeff," extending his hand for a handshake.

"And I'm Margaret," shaking his hand.

"So Margaret, are you new around here? I've never seen you before."

"I moved here last year." She tries to avoid the subject. She doesn't want to have to explain where she had come from, or why she had moved to Hawaii. "So you like taking walks on the beach, too? she asks, trying to change the subject.

"Yes, I do. It's what I grew up doing. It's what I used to do everyday before moving to California."

"California? Nice place."

"You've been there before?"

"Yes. But it was a long time ago." She looks away, remembering all the places she has been to while she was still working for Division. "Anyway, i gotta go. It was nice talking to you."

He doesn't want her leave yet but he knows he can't beg her to stay without making himself look pathetic.

"Okay. I'll see you around."

He watches her walk away until he can no longer see her. He can't deny it, he is attracted to this woman. He has never felt this way with any one before. But with Nikita, he feels the connection. In her eyes, he sees what he hasn't seen in anyone before; her soul. He thinks about her and wonders if their paths will ever cross again.


	4. Chapter 4

**_The stars, the moon,  
They have all been blown out,  
You left me in the dark.  
No dawn, no day,  
I'm always in this twilight,  
In the shadow of your heart_**.

xxx

It's been 2 months since Michael arrived in Hawaii. He's been using the money Birkhoff gave to him; the money he stole from Percy after he left Division. It's been 2 months and he still hasn't seen or heard from Nikita. His frustration is growing as days go by but giving up is not an option for him. He knows that if he wants to succeed in finding Nikita, he is going to have to be very patient. Ever since he arrived, he's been moving from one motel to the next. He knows Nikita is in this island but he does not know her exact location. This week, Michael is in Oahu. He rents a motel near the beach. He feels her. He feels her nearby. He can feel her presence and hear her heart beat. "I know you're here, Nikita. Please come back to me. Please lead me to you," he whispers to himself as he makes his way downstairs. He goes down to the lobby and makes a 1-month security deposit. Unlike before, this time he intends to stay in this island for a long time. He is certain that this is the place. The place where he'll find Nikita.

xxx

For the past weeks, Nikita and Jeff have developed a friendship. She never planned to make any friends, especially not with a guy. But she can't help but become fond of Jeff. Somehow he reminds her of Owen. The way he makes her laugh, the way he protects her, the way he teases her and calls her bossy, it all reminds her of her good friend Owen.

It's 5:00 pm and Nikita just finished her shift at the bar. She makes her way to her car when she hears someone yells her name..

"Margaretttt!"

Nikita turns her head towards the familiar voice. "Oh, hey, Jeff. What are you doing here?" she asks smiling.

"Um, nothing. Just walking around."

"Oh, okay. I got-" Jeff interrupts her.

"I was wondering, would you like to accompany me to dinner tonight?"

"Um, you know, I-" Jeff interrupts her again.

"Please? It's my birthday and I just don't want to be alone? Please?" he begs, giving Nikita the puppy face.

"Oh, stop that. Don't give me that look," she says, opening the trunk of her car.

"Please?" he begs, still giving her the puppy face.

"Fine, fine. But just so we're clear, this is not a date okay?"

"Yes! Thanks, Margaret!" he says excitedly.

"Not a date! Are we clear?"

"Crystal clear."

"Perfect."

"Okay. Go home and change. Wear a dress. Nothing too fancy. A simple dress would do. I'll meet you back here in an hour."

"Alrighty then."

xxx

Michael has spent a whole week searching the streets. He's been out all day, all night, for a week searching for Nikita. He has searched several local restaurants, but still no luck. Today he decided to stay in his room.

"Hello, Mikey?" Birkhoff answers the phone.

"Birkhoff, any lead on Nikita? Has she appeared on the radar?"

"No, man. Look, Mikey, maybe we should just-" Michael interrupts him before he could even finish his sentence.

"No! I am not giving up! I'm not giving up on Nikita! If I have to sacrifice myself again, I would do it just to have her in my arms again!" he says angrily.

"Mikey, I know you want her back. We all do. But she left for a reason. Maybe-" he is quickly interrupted again.

"Fuck it! And you expect me to just be okay with it? I didn't choose this. She made the decision for me," his voice cracking. His tears are slowly falling on his cheeks. "Birkhoff, I can't give up on her. I just can't. And please don't ask me to let her go because Nikita is my life. Without her, I'm nothing. "

Birkhoff has known Michael for a long time and not once did her ever hear or see him cry. But this time, this very moment, he is certain that his friend is crying. He can hear his heart shatter.

"Mikey, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it like that. I'm sorry," he says, feeling bad about what he had said earlier. "We will do everything we can, me and Sonya, to locate Nikita. I promise, man."

"Thank you. You don't know how much this means to me."

xxx

Jeff stands in front of the bar, waiting anxiously for Nikita. He checks his watch every 2 minutes, and unconsciously checks himself at the same time in the side mirror of his car.

"Margaret, where are you?" he mumbles to himself.

A few minutes later, Nikita arrives. She walks towards Jeff's car, and as soon as Jeff sees her, his mouth automatically drops open. Nikita wears a backless, red dress. The dress is not too short, but short enough to show off her long legs. Her short hair is perfectly waved and her face only has a touch of make-up. And since she made it clear earlier that this is not date, she pairs her dress with black flat shoes. He stares at her for what seems like forever.

"Hello? Anybody there?" Nikita says, playfully waving her hand in front of Jeff's face.

"Oh, yeah. Hi, there," he says, clearing his throat while rubbing his eyes with his hands.

"Are you sick or something?" she teases.

"No. It's just that you look so beautiful tonight."

"Are you trying to say I looked ugly before?" she asks jokingly.

"No, no. That's not what-" Nikita interrupts him.

"Relax. I was just kidding. Take a chill pill, will you?" she says laughing.

"Oh, I-" Nikita interrupts him again.

"So are we going to have dinner? Or are you just going to make me watch you watch me uncomfortably?"

"Right. Sorry. Let's go, shall we? My car."

"Alrighty then."

FLASHBACK:

_It's been a long day at Division. Michael led the operation while Nikita was in the field with Owen. When the day was finally over, Nikita and Michael headed home. They had nice meal together, took a long bath together and made love the whole night through. The night seemed longer, and as exhausted as they were, they did not want to sleep. Instead, they cuddled in bed. They laid in bed naked and just looked at each other's eyes. It's been a while since they've spent time like this, and God, did they miss each other._

_Then Michael broke the silence. "Nikita, I love you," he said, looking right into her eyes. He placed a hand on her face, and she quickly leaned closer and closed her eyes._

_"I love you, too, Michael," she replied, brushing his hair with her fingers._

_"I wish we could stay here forever. I wish we could be like this forever," he said, placing a kiss on her lips._

_"We will. When this is all over, we will have the life we have always wanted."_

_"We'll live in a beach somewhere."_

_"In Barbados," she says smiling._

_"Yes, in Barbados," hugging her tightly._


	5. Chapter 5

"Mikey, I think it's a good idea to start meeting people," Birkhoff said over the phone.

"Start meeting people?," Michael repeats irritatedly. "Look, Birkhoff-," Birkhoff quickly interrupts.

"No, Mikey. What I meant and perhaps I didn't say it well, is that you need to go out and meet people. Just people in general. Not necessarily women. I think staying in the room and walking around the city to find Nikki isn't working anymore. Maybe you should get a job? You know, just to establish some connections. Maybe you'll find her quicker that way," he explains.

"Maybe you're right. Maybe if I meet people they will be able to lead me rigt to Nikita. Not a bad strategy. "

"Bingo!" Bikhoff yells playfully.

"Thanks, Birkhoff."

xxx

It's midnight and Nikita is still wide awake. She sits in bed and finds herself thinking about Michael. She misses him so badly, especially right this very moment. It is that time of year where she and Michael would stay up all night long. After a long night of lovemaking, Michael would come in to the room with a cake. It's that time of year where he would sing 'Happy Birthday' to her and ask her to make a wish. And every time she makes the same wish: that is to be with Michael forever and have a peaceful life with him. It is that time of year. But this year, she sits alone in bed with no cake, no birthday song and without the man she loves next to her. The only thing she is left with is a wish..

"I wish that Michael finds his happiness..without me. I want him to be happy and to have a life. I want him to be able to move on and just forget about me," she says, tears falling down her cheeks. "I love you, Michael. Goodbye."

xxx

FLASHBACK:

It's been a crazy week at Division. They've been so busy trying to track down rouge agents, and having the President constantly threatening to wipe them out isn't helping their situation, either. They've been on the move all day, all night. One night, Nikita asked Ryan if she could go home early. She fought three men in the alley earlier that afternoon and one of the men kicked her in the stomach. She didn't feel good and asked to go home early without Michael. She went home, took a shower and went right to sleep.

Michael walked into the house quietly, trying not to wake Nikita. He opened the bedroom door and saw her face down, sleeping peacefully. He stood there for what seemed like forever, just staring and admiring how beautiful she is. He walked over to the bed and sat next to her. He gently kissed her cheek and that caused her to wake up.

"Michael? she says sleepily.

"Happy Birthday, beautiful," he says, with so much love and affection in his tone.

Nikita sat up on the bed and saw Michael holding a cake. She quickly threw her arms around him, almost knocking the cake off his hands.

"Ooops! Sorry," she chuckles.

"Make a wish"

She closed her eyes for a few minutes and made her wish. She opened her eyes and gazed into Michael's eyes. She gave him a passionate kiss before blowing her candles.

Michael scooped some icing with his fingers and put it on Nikita's lips. Before she could even say a word, he started licking the icing and kissed her passionately.

"I love you, Nikita."

"I love you, too, Michael."

xxx

Michael lays on the sand, looking at the dark midnight sky with a cake next to him. He takes the ring out of his pocket and stares at it with such sadness and despair. He closes his eyes and makes a wish, "Wherever you are, I hope you are well and happy. Happy Birthday, Nikita. I love you." He blows the candles and stares back at the sky, "I will see you soon, my love."

xxx

Jeff stops by at the bar to see Nikita but to his surprise, she is not there. He asks the manager but she tells him that she didn't not come in to work at all today. Jeff quickly drives to Nikita's house. He finds himself worrying about a woman he barely knows. A woman he's only known for a few months.

"God. Why am I so worried about her? Why do I care about her too much?," he mumbles while he drives.

Jeff is a handsome, intelligent man. Women have always been drawn to her, and he's always been a player. He never really took women seriously, and if anything, he is a heartbreaker. However, he finds himself falling for Nikita. He sees something special in her that he has never seen in anyone before. He is falling for her and he is falling dangerously hard.

He knocks on her front door. He feels nervous, not knowing what he'll find. Nikita isn't one to call-in sick.

Nikita opens the door. She is surpised to see anyone at her doorstep, especially Jeff. "Oh, hey, Jeff. What are you doing here?"

"Hey, Margaret. I just came by to see if you're okay. I dropped by the bar and the manager said you called in sick."

"I'm fine," she says, with obvious sadness look in her eyes.

Jeff gently grabs her chin and lifts it so she can look directly at him. "Hey, look at me. What's wrong? I know something's wrong. Please talk to me. Let me in."

She can see the sincerity in his eyes and somehow he reminds her of Michael. Surprisingly, she opens up to him.

"Today is my birthday and-" Jeff interrupts her.

"Is it why you're sad?"

Nikita looks at him and nods. "I just feel so alone. I just-" she is quickly interrupted again.

"Let's go! Go change because I am taking you out," he says cheerfully.

"Oh, no no. I don't really feel like going out."

"No, I will not let you mope around at home. Especially not today! That's what I'm for. We're friends, remember?"

"But.."

"Please? I promise you'll have a blast."

Nikita stands there silently. "What the heck, right? Live a little, Nikita. You need to let go" she thought to herself. "Okay. Let me change and I'll be right back."

"That's my girl," he says excitedly.

Nikita turns her head towards him and raises her eyebrow.

"I meant, good. Just good," he says, suddenly feeling nervous and embarassed.

"Alrighty. I'll be right back."

xxx

Jeff takes Nikita to the beach. While Nikita was getting ready, he called in to book a last-minute reservation to a restaurant, overlooking the ocean. They arrive at the beach and Jeff leads Nikita to the restaurant just a few steps away from the shore. The waitress leads them upstairs, a private deck that overlooks the gorgeous ocean.

"Wow. The view is spectacular," Nikita says.

"I'm glad you like it. Happy Birthday."

The two of them share a nice dinner. They talk and laugh, and all of a sudden, a song came on.

Jeff grabs Nikita's hand. "Let's go!"

"Wait. Go where?"

"Downstairs! Dance floor!"

"Dance floor?Oh, no no. I don't dance."

"Sure you don't. I don't care. We're dancing whether you want or not." Jeff pulls her out of her chair and drags her downstairs.

Nikita couldn't help but laugh. She laughs so hard while standing on the dance floor.

Jeff is mesmirized by her laugh. He stands there and just stares at her, admiring her. "God. She is so beautiful," he thought to himself.

"Alright fine. Since it's my birthday I guess I'll dance," she says smiling.

"Wha-?" before he can even finish his sentence, Nikita grabs his hand and drags him in the middle of the dance floor.

"What? I thought you wanted to dance? What are you waiting for?" she teases.

After dancing for almost 2 hours, Jeff takes her out to the beach for a walk. They walk near the shore and  
Nikita couldn't help but enjoy Jeff's company. A part of him reminds her of Owen, and another part of him reminds her of Michael. She can't remember the last time she laughed but tonight, that's all what she's been doing.

Jeff drives her back to her house. He walks her to the front door and as they say their goodbyes, their lips meet. Neither of them know how it happened or who started it, but here they are, kissing. Nikita pulls away, her heart racing. She is confused and angry at herself for kissing him back. She stands there and looks at Jeff, but it seems like her lips have a life of their own and quickly catch his lips for another kiss. But unlike earlier, this kiss is needy and passionate. She curses herself for allowing this to happen but she is only human, and just like everybody else, she needs to feel loved, she needs to be caressed and her needs must be satisfied. They make their way inside the house, ripping each other's clothes off as they make their way into Nikita's bedroom. She tries to stop, she wants to stop. But it seems like as if she has no control of her own body. Perhaps she had a little too much alcohol earlier. God she misses Michael. In fact, she is picturing Michael instead of Jeff. She misses him so much that she is letting another man touch her while she pretends he is Michael.

They finally make it to her bedroom. Both of them are now only in their underwears. Jeff pulls away and holds Nikita's face with his two hands. He is well aware that Nikita is drunk and he doesn't want to take advantage of her.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" he asks, looking right into her eyes.

"Please?" she replies, her eyes teary and voice is cracking; it almost sounds as if she's begging.

Before he could even say anything, Nikita smashes her lips into him. Jeff gently lays her on the bed. He pulls away once again and brushes her hair out of her face. He caresses her face and looks right into her eyes. She looks back right at him but instead of Jeff's, she is seeing Michael's face. She suddenly pulls his head down towards her and kisses him so passionately. She slides her tongue and pulls his body closer to her.

She breaks the kiss and whispers, "Please, make love to me."

And with that Jeff loses it. He kisses Nikita's neck, whispering her name as he goes further down. He unclasps her bra and gently kisses her breasts. "Margaret, you are so beautiful." He continues his way down, trailing kisses on her stomach, thighs and legs. He spreads her legs and places kisses on top of her underwear. Nikita moans and grabs the sheet. She is out of it. Her head is spinning, she's in extreme ecstacy. Jeff gently sweeps her panties to the side and slips his tongue on her clit. He licks her up and down, so gently and so slowly, with so much passion, blowing hot air in between licks. This makes her moan so loud. Then Jeff takes off her panties and spreads her legs wider apart. He positions himself in the center and places both hands on her hips. He enters her gently and starts thrusting. He is looking right at Nikita. He can see her world spin and lose control. With each thrust he sees her fall apart and it arouses him even more.

"Aaahh. Oh, God! Harder!" Nikita screams.

Jeff keeps thrusting deeper and faster.

"Fuck! Oh, fuck! Aaahhh. I'm almost there. Fuck! I'm coming!" she cries breathlessly.

Nikita's moans drive Jeff crazy. He's never been so aroused like this before. He can't get enough of her. He keeps pounding on her, about to reach his own orgasm. He thrusts one more time and he finally reaches his climax.

"Aaaahh, Margaret! Margaret!"

A few seconds later, Nikita follows. She had multiple orgasms and finally explodes.

"Michaaael! Michaaael! I've missed you so much Michael," she says with her eyes closed.

Jeff's eyes widens. He couldn't believe his ears. All this time he thought he was pleasuring her. All those pleads, those moans, he thought they were for him. But now he quickly realizes that they were for someone else. She made love to his body but her heart, mind and soul made love to a different man, Michael. Instead of feeling hurt, he suddenly feels bad for her. He watches her lay there peacefully and satisfied. He watches her and realizes how beautiful and precious she truly is. Jeff gets out of bed and gathers all his clothes. Nikita's so exhausted that she did not even open her eyes after she orgasmed. She is fast asleep, satisfied and drunk, that she doesn't even notice Jeff had left.


	6. Chapter 6

The sun is shining brightly through her bedroom window, and Nikita lays in bed face down, with her hair all over her face. She wakes up with a terrible headache, and her legs are incredibly sore. She pulls herself up and sits on the bed. It takes several minutes before she notices that she is actually naked. She sits there nervously, not ready to face reality. Then she remembers what had happened last night. She remembers kissing Jeff and sleeping with him. Then it hits her. She suddenly feels sick to her stomach. She cannot believe she had slept with another man. She hates herself for being weak; for betraying Michael.

"Oh, God. What have I done?," she says sobbing. She jumps out of bed and heads straight to the shower. She turns on the hot water and gets in there, not caring that the water is too hot that it is scalding her skin. She rubs herself over and over, feeling disgusted with herself. She closes her eyes and lifts her head towards the running water. "Michael, I'm so sorry! I'm sorry!" she says, sobbing hysterically.

xxx

Jeff decided to go to work early today. He left Hawaii to pursue a career in the medical field a few years back but ended up coming back and opening up his own business. He realized that medicine was not for him, and all those years he spent living in the city made him realize how much he missed his home. He went back to Hawaii almost a year ago. He opened up a company that offers swimming lessons, surfing lessons, and diving lessons for tourists. This morning, he finds himself thinking about Nikita. He sits in his office, watching his employees through the window, train young tourists how to catch waves. He takes himself back to the previous night he shared with Nikita. He remembers the way she kissed him, the way she closed her eyes and the way she begged him to make love to her. He is falling for her. She is the only woman who made him feel this way. But he knows that she is in love with someone else; the guy whose name she screamed when they made love. A guy named Michael.

"I care about you a lot, Margaret," he mumbles to himself. "I am going to take your pain away. I will make you forget about him. I want to take care of you."

xxx

Michael follows Birkhoff's advice. He has been going around town, searching for the perfect job to apply to. He doesn't want just any job. He wants a job that will expose him to a lot of different people. He wants a job near the beach because he knows how much Nikita loves the beach. He remembers the time he and Nikita came to this very same island to complete a mission. He remembers Nikita begging him to take a walk on the beach even just for a few minutes before they board the plane back to the States. He remembers her sitting on the sand, looking up in the sky. She stared in the sky without blinking, and let out a sigh. " I wish I could just stay on this beach, or any beach, forever. When I hear the ocean, all my fears and worries go away." Michael is certain that the beach will lead him right to her. His gut is telling him he will find her here, the same gut that led him to Nikita's loft a few years ago.

xxx

Nikita just finished her shift at the bar and decides to spend the rest of the afternoon at the beach. She takes a walk along the shore, still feeling horrible about what had happened the previous night. She keeps rewinding the events, wishing that she could somehow undo what she did. She regrets going with Jeff to the beach. She regrets dancing with him, and she definitely regrets drinking alcohol. She knows that if she hadn't let herself get so wasted with alcohol, there was no way in hell she'd sleep with Jeff. No way! She feels horrible and ashamed. Eventhough she and Michael are no longer together, she feels like she had betrayed him. She hates herself for betraying the man she loves, her fiancè. Even though they are apart and probably will never see or be together again, her heart still belongs to Michael. Her heart still beats and longs for him. It is still him. Always have; always will. She faces the ocean, lost in deep thought. She misses Michael. She longs for Michael. And her actions last night seem to make her feel worse. Then someone taps her shoulder and interrupts her thoughts. She turns around and sees Jeff. She looks at him, not knowing what to say. She is not ready to face Jeff. She feels ashamed of what she did, and she certainly doesn't want to lead him on.

"Hi. How are you?," he asks, with sadness in his tone and his eyes.

Nikita just looks at him, doesn't say anything.

"Are you avoiding me? Look, Margaret. About what happened la-," Nikita quickly interrupts.

"Last night was a mistake, Jeff," she says, almost bursting into tears.

Jeff looks hurt and disappointed. "Not to me, it wasn't. Last night wasn't just a one night stand for me, Margaret. In fact, it was one of the best nights of my life. I've-" Nikita interrupts him again.

"Stop. Please stop. Don't say it. What happened between us last night was a mistake. It meant nothing. I was just lonely and drunk and it didn't mean a damn thing. So please, just forget it ever happened."

"Is it because of Michael?," he asks bitterly.

Nikita's eyes widened, her throat is constricting and she is certain that her heart even skipped a beat. "How did you know about Michael?," she asks angrily.

"You, uh..you screamed his name last night after we, uh, uh," he pauses awkwardly.

Nikita doesn't wait for him to finish his sentence. She looks down on the ground and she feels her heart ache. "Yes, it's Michael," she says softly.

"Margaret, please, don't do this. Don't do this to me. Please don't push me away. I won't force you to do anything, just please, don't push me away," he pleads.

"Jeff-" he interrupts her.

"Please. If you want to forget about last night, fine. I will never mention it again, just please, stay. Stay in my life."

Nikita looks at Jeff and she can see pain, desperation and even love. She can see and feel him fall for her. She left Michael behind because she didn't want him to get hurt, and now here she is, hurting another man. "Jeff, look, I don't want to hurt you."

"You would only hurt me if you completely disappear in my life."

Those words break her heart. She never planned for any of this to happen. She doesn't deserve to be loved but yet here she is, being loved by two men. She doesn't love Jeff but she does care about him as a friend. For the past months, he's been the only person who's been there for her. The last thing she wants to do is hurt him, but that's seems to be her talent because she is breaking his heart, just like she broke Michael's heart.

xxx

Michael finally finds the perfect place. The perfect job to apply to. He was walking by the beach the other day and saw a "Wanted: Swimming/diving instructor" sign. He knew that was the perfect job considering he was once worked in the United States Navy. He walked in and signed an application, and today, he gets a call, asking him to come in for an

interview.

"Wow, that was quick," he thought.

He makes his way into the office, and looks for the man he had spoken with earlier over the phone.

"Excuse me, I'm Michael and I have an interview with the owner," he says to the lady.

"Okay. Take a seat and I'll let Mr. Cohen know you're here."

A few minutes later..

"Mr. Cohen would like to see you now. Come follow me."

Knocks on the door..

"Good afternoon, Mr. Cohen. I'm Michael, we've spoken earlier. I am applying to be a swimming and diving instructor," he says politely.

"Yes, I remember. Pleased to meet you, Michael. I'm very impressed with your credentials. By the way, just call me Jeff," he says, offering his hand for a shake.


	7. Chapter 7

It has been 2 weeks since Michael got the job as a diving instructor. He has been spending all day and all night at the beach but still no sign of Nikita. He took this job as a cover while he searches for Nikita, but to his surprise, he is actually enjoying it. Somehow it reminds him of his training days when he joined the military. It also helps get his mind off things.

His shift just ended and he heads back to the employee lounge to get his things. He sits on the couch and dials Birkhoff's number..

"Bikhoff, how are things going over there? Has she appeared on the radar?," he asks, speaking a bit faster than usual.

"Oh, hey, Mikey. I am doing very well, thanks for asking. How about yourself?," Birkhoff replies sarcastically.

"Sorry, I am just a little frustrated. How are you and Sonya?"

"I was just kidding, Mikey. We're good. Everything is good. And to answer your first question, No, she hasn't," he says, pausing for a few seconds. "How about you, any signs of Nikki?"

"No..," there is an awkward silence for a few minutes. "No sign of Nikita yet."

Birkhoff could sense trouble in Michael's voice. He could sense frustration, desperation, hopelessness and pain. And Birkhoff feels the same way. He doesn't want to give up but knowing how stubborn Nikita is, he knows damn well that finding her is like finding needle in a hay stack.

"Don't worry, Mikey. We'll find her. Maybe she is just busy swimming with the whales or dancing the hula dance," he says, trying to cheer Michael up.

Michael lets out a fake laugh and looks at the ocean. "Yeah, maybe. Thanks, Birkhoff."

After the phone call, he decides to head to the nearby bar. He doesn't want to go home because he knows that if he stays there, he will get more depressed and frustrated. He walks in and takes a seat at the bar.

"I'll have a glass of scotch, please," he tells the bartender.

He sits there quietly, thinking very deeply while drinking his alcohol. No matter where he is or what he does, he can't seem to get his mind off Nikita. He sees her face and hears her voice everywhere he goes. Then a familiar voice interrupts his quiet moment..

"Drinking alone, I see," the man says playfully. "Give us some shots and beers, please," he says to the bartender.

Michael turns around and sees Jeff taking the empty seat next to him.

"Hi, Jeff," he says, completely ignoring his earlier comment.

"Girlfriend?"

"What?"

"Girlfriend. A wife. A woman. You know, the reason why you're getting drunk at 5 in the afternoon."

"No. Not a girlfriend. Um, ah..a fiancè," he says with an apparent sadness in his voice.

"You're engaged? Congrats! Where is she? Is she here with you on the island?"

"Yes," he replies, not trying to elaborate.

"Then what's the problem? Why are you here getting drunk instead of cuddling with your woman at home?"

Normally questions like these annoy Michael, but today he doesn't mind. Perhaps it is the effect of alcohol.

"Because-," he hesitates. "..because she left me," he says, taking two shots in a row.

"I'm sorry, man. I didn't mean to. I didn't know, I'm sorry."

"It's alright. She can't get rid of me that easily. I'm here to get her back. Speaking of, what about you? Why are you getting your ass drunk at 5:00 in the afternoon? Let me guess. A woman?"

"Unfortunately, yes."

"What happened? If you don't mind me asking."

"It's this woman. I've only known her for a few months but I think I'm falling for her. I think I'm in love with her," Jeff explains, looking at the empty shot glass he is holding.

"What's the problem with that?"

"The problem is, she's in love with someone else."

"How do you know that? Does she have a boyfriend?"

"I'm not sure. It could be an ex-lover, I don't know."

"Then what makes you say she's in love with him," he asks curiously.

"Because."

"Because what?"

"Um. Because..because she screamed out his name while we were, uh, um..while we were making love," he says, feeling a bit awkward and embarassed.

"Oh," he replies, trying to think of what to say next.

"I know. But I can't blame her. I knew she wasn't ready for that step. It was too soon. It only happened because she was drunk and lonely, and I let my emotions cloud my judgment. I never should have allowed it to happen. She just was not ready," he says shaking his head.

"You really love her, don't you?"

"I think I do. Margaret is-Well, she is an amazing woman. Not only is she beautiful but she is also smart, funny and tough. She's a pretty strong chic. I've never met a woman like her."

Michael stays quiet. The woman Jeff is describing reminds him of Nikita. He couldn't help but miss her. It breaks him knowing that he once had a woman like that, and because of his desire to have his hand back, he had lost her.

"Are you okay?," Jeff asks, noticing Michael's sudden silence.

"Yes. So what are you going to do now?"

"I don't know, man. I really don't. I don't want to push her into doing something she is not ready for, but I'm afraid that if I don't hold on to her, I would lose her completely."

"You wanna know what I think? If you really love her you gotta show her and let her know. Even if she pushes you away, stay, do not go. Do not give up on her. Wait until she becomes ready to open up her heart to you."

Jeff can feel Michael's sincerity and he is glad that the two of them had this talk. He is grateful for Michael's advice considering the two of them are not even friends.

"I guess you're right. Thanks, man. I appreciate it."

Michael gets up from his seat and taps Jeff's shoulder. "I'll see you later. I'm gonna head home now."

xxx

Nikita is getting ready for bed when she hears a knock on the door. She glances at the clock and it's almost 9:30. She opens the door and is surprised by not only Jeff's unexpected visit, but also by his drunken appearance.

"Oh, my God, Jeff. Are you okay? You're drunk!" she says, leading him inside the house.

"Yeah, just a little," he says, his words are slurred.

"Just a little? You can't even walk!" she says angrily.

"Are you mad? Margaret, sorry, I just had a little drink, that's all. I'm fine."

"What the hell are you doing here? Do you realize how late it is?!"

"I know. I just wanted to see you."

"Jeff, listen, you need to go home. We'll talk in the morning, okay?" her tone is now soft and low.

Jeff nods his head and holds out his hand. Nikita reaches out her hand and helps him up. He stumbles and almost falls to the ground, but Nikita being a trained assassin, she reacts fast and catches him by the hand. As soon as they're both back on their feet, Jeff grabs Nikita by the shoulder and kisses her passionately. She doesn't kiss him back but she doesn't stop him, either. She doesn't know why she didn't stop the kiss. Maybe because she feels sorry for him, or perhaps it's because she knows that she is somehow the reason why he is drunk in the first place. Jeff finally breaks the kiss and looks at Nikita.

"I know you're not ready, and believe me, I understand. But I want you to know that I am not giving up. I will stick around for as long as it takes. You can't get rid of me that easily. I care about you a lot, Margaret. And I am willing to wait."

Nikita is speechless. She does not know what to say or how to react. She is hoping that he will forget about all this in the morning, but she knows that is not the case. She can see with her own two eyes that this man is falling for her, and she doesn't know how to stop it. Then Jeff walks closer to her and kisses her gently on the lips before he walks out the door.

_FLASHBACK:_

_"What the hell were you thinking drugging me like that?" Michael snaps angrily._

_"I was trying to protect you."_

_"Well, you almost got yourself killed."_

_"Look, avenging Ryan was my mission."_

_"There's no 'my' anymore, there's only 'ours'- as in WE share the losses, WE share the risks and most importantly, WE share the decisions."_

_"I was thinking about you!"_

_"No, you made the decision for me! Do you ever stop to think how I would feel if I lost you? God, you have no idea how much you mean to me, Nikita. No idea." He paused, tears threatening to fall. "If you ever pull a stunt like that again, we're through."_

_He walked away and left her standing there in the dark. She could see the pain and fear in his eyes; fear of almost losing her. She felt bad but she didn't regret doing it. If she had to do it over again to keep him safe, she would._

_Michael got into the bedroom he shared with Nikita. He was so mad he could barely stand it. He faced the nearest wall and started punching it. He punched it over and over again until his knuckles ripped open. Then he grabbed the vodka sitting on the table and drank it down straight from the bottle._

_Nikita waited for an hour before she went upstairs. She wanted to give Michael some time to cool off. She heard him punching the wall earlier and he's been quiet for almost an hour so she decided to go up. She slowly opened the bedroom door and was surprised to see a big hole on the wall. She immediately scanned the room to look for Michael and she finally found him sitting on the floor, next the bed. His hand was bleeding but the blood around the wound had already dried off. Michael heard her come in but did not even bother to look up or look in her direction. She quickly went to Michael and kneeled down in front of him. She could tell he was drunk. He still didn't look at her, instead, he drank the last remaining vodka in the bottle. Nikita grabbed his face with both of her hands._

_"Michael, look at me. I know you're angry with me and I don't blame you. I'm sorry," she says, looking him straight in the eye._

_"I almost lost you, Nikita," he says, finally looking at her. His tone was a bit more softer than it was an hour ago. Perhaps it was the effect of vodka._

_"But you didn't."_

_"But I could-" Nikita interrupts him._

_"Shhh..," she shushed him, and pulled him for a passionate kiss._

_Michael picked her up and crashed her body to the wall. He kissed her roughly and passionately. He pulled away, "Don't ever scare me like that ever again." He spun her around and threw her on the bed. Nikita has never seen this side of Michael. He's always been so gentle with her, this was the first time he threw her like that on the bed._

_"Ooh, aren't we a little aggressive tonight?" she teased._

_"And you're loving every minute of it," he said in a low husky voice, crawling his way on top of Nikita._

_"Maybe," she whispered in his ear._

_"You must be punished. You should be scared," he said, biting her neck._

_"Oh, I'm terrified."_


	8. Chapter 8

Over the past several weeks, things have been great between Jeff and Nikita. Jeff knows that Nikita is not ready for anything other than a friendship, and he is more than happy to have just that. Or at least for now anyway. What matters to him at this moment, is that Nikita is here with him, by his side.

xxx

Jeff's birthday is coming up and he wants to celebrate this special day with Nikita. But instead of inviting her to a romantic dinner like last time, which he knows will only make her uncomfortable and would only remind her of what happened the last time they went out to dinner, he decides it would be best if he just plans various activities for them to do at the beach. Being a business owner of one of the biggest surfing companies in Oahu, he decides it would be fun to let Nikita into his world.

Jeff stops by the bar to see Nikita. He sees her getting into her car. He runs quickly and manages to grab her hand before she opens the car door.

"Geez! Don't sneek up on me like that," she says, feeling a little jumpy.

"Oh, sorry. I didn't mean to," he replies apologetically.

"So what's up? You need something from me?"

"Yes. Uhm. I wanted to ask you if you have any plans this Friday. Friday night."

"Uhm. That depends. Why?"

"Well, funny you should ask. Uhm, it's my birthday and-" Nikita interrupts him.

"Your birthday?..again?!," she says, with a YOU'VE-GOT-TO-BE-KIDDING-ME look of her face.

"Margaret, look-," he is interrupted again.

"Didn't you just have your birthday? Uhm, I don't know, uhm, like 8-9 months ago?," she says, her hands on her hips. "How many times were you born?"

"I-uhm, I lied. It wasn't really my birthday 9 months ago. I just said that so you wouldn't turn down my invitation."

"Is that so? Uhm, so how do I know that this isn't just one of your many birthdays?," she asks playfully.

"I swear. It really is my birthday on Friday. I can even show you my birth certificate if you want."

Nikita laughs and covers her face with her hands. He really does remind her of Owen. Jeff looks at her, confused. "What are you laughing about?"

She tries to stop laughing but instead, she keeps laughing even harder and harder. "Okay. I'll go with you," she says, completely ignoring his question.

"What's so funny?"

"Goodbye, Jeff. I'll see you Friday," she says, still laughing. She gets into her car and starts the ignition.

"Hey! Come back here! What's so funny?"

Nikita drives off, leaving Jeff in the parking lot, looking all confused.

"What the hell was she laughing about?," he mumbles to himself.

xxx

Jeff goes to work with a big smile on his face. He walks in to his office singing and dancing.

"Someone's in a good mood," Michael teases.

"I guess you could say that," he replies happily.

"Let me guess. A woman?"

"Damn, right! I'm taking her out on Friday," he says proudly.

"Good. Good for you. So the two of you are an item now?," he asks curiously.

"Um, no, not yet. But I know we'll get there eventually. Right now all she is ready for is a friendship, and that's what I'm giving, a great friendship."

"Good for you, man."

"Hey, I have you to thank for that. I followed your advice and because of that Margaret have become more comfortable with me, and it brought us closer."

"Don't thank me. I didn't do anything. It's all you, bro," he says, tapping Jeff's shoulder.

Michael never expected that he would develop friendship outside Division. Ever since his family died, he has never really had any interaction with other people. The only people he had interactions with were either Division agents and recruits, or Division targets. This friendship he developed with Jeff is something so unexpected, and something that he is truly grateful for, especially in this very dark and sad moment of his life.

"What about you? How are things with you and your fiancè?

"The same," he replies.

Jeff quickly realizes that he made a mistake. The sudden pain in Michael's face when he mentioned the word 'fiancè' told him that Michael isn't ready and does not want to talk about it.

"I gotta get going," Michael says, trying to avoid the conversation.

"Okay, bro. I'll see you tomorrow."

xxx

Friday night comes and Jeff is so excited to pick up Nikita. He had this whole evening planned out. He knocks on her front door and he could hear footsteps approaching the door.

"Oh, hello there, beautiful. Are you ready?" he says, in an exagerrated British accent.

"Oh, hey birthday boy. Did you bring your birth certificate?," she teases.

"Whaat? I-" she interrupts him.

"Relax. I was kidding. Let's go?"

Nikita wears a floral maxi dress, and a pair of bikini underneath. Jeff told her to wear a beach outfit because they'll be spending their time at the beach doing all sorts of activities. Jeff takes her hand and leads her to his motorcycle.

"Are we riding on this?," she asks excitedly.

"Of course. You wouldn't really appreciate the beauty of Oahu unless you travel by foot, or a motorcycle. Go, hop in."

She hops in and wraps her arms securely and tightly around Jeff's torso. Her touch sends shiver down his spine and he can feel his knees weaken. The wind blows and he can smell her scent in the air. "God, she smells so good," he thought to himself. He can't help but think about the night they made love. He can still remember her smell when he kissed her neck; he still remembers how she tasted, and he still remembers the look on her face everytime she threw her head back due to extreme pleasure. All of these memories are making him so aroused. He's thankful that she is sitting behind him and will not be able to see him fall apart. He tries to brush off the thought out of his head and continues to drive.

xxx

Michael sits at the bar and sees Jeff speeding off in a jetski with a woman. The woman is petite, wearing a black two-piece bikini, and her hair is tied up in a bun. She is holding on tightly to Jeff as they crash into the waves. He tries to look at the woman's face but they are so far away that he could even barely recognize his own friend's face. He orders his usual drink and calls Birkhoff.

"Birkhoff, any leads on Nikita?"

"No, sorry. But Alex called, she said she's coming back to help find Nikita."

"Birkhoff, listen to me, tell her I appreciate the thought but I need her to stay where she is and track down Amanda. The sooner we capture that bitch, the sooner we could clear Nikita's name and bring her back home."

"Are you sure, Mikey?Are you sure you're okay being all alone there in Hawaii?," he asks, with concern in his voice.

"Yes. And I am not alone. I have a friend," he says, looking out the window to glance at Jeff.

xxx

Nikita runs along the shore and Jeff follows close behind. Jeff catches up to her, grabs her by the waist and lifts her up. He spins her around several times, and it surprises Nikita of how strong he is. He puts her down and looks her in the eyes. "Thank you for making me happy, Margaret," he says, giving Nikita a kiss on the cheek.

Nikita gives him a friendly smile and quickly changes the subject. She loves being with Jeff and he makes her forget that the whole country is after her, but she is not ready to get involved with anyone. Even though it's been almost 2 years now, her heart still longs for Michael.

"So, what now? What's next in our agenda?"

"Geez! So impatient," he says playfully. "Well, let me show you." He takes her hand and leads her where the boats are. Then he steps in the boat and holds a hand out for her. He helps her up and hands her a diving suit. Her face lights up and turns around to look at the ocean. Jeff watches her carefully and it makes him happy knowing that he is able to make her smile and laugh. For all the time he's known her, he has never seen her like this; so happy and care free. She's always been so serious and emotionally distant, that it makes it difficult to know how or what she truly feels. Tonight, he see's a different Margaret.

It's almost 6:30 and the sun still shines brightly. Michael decides to take a jetski out for a spin. He had a little drink earlier but he is not at all tipsy or drunk. He speeds off, enjoying the roughness of the waves. It's been years since he became this close to the ocean. He sees Jeff and his girl from afar, and he decides to head to their direction to say hi.

Nikita walks in the deck all geared up and ready to dive.

"Tada! I'm ready!," she says playfully.

"Someone's a little excited," he teases.

"Shut up. Let's go!"

She positions herself on the platform, with her back facing the open water. Jeff, on the other hand, stands next to her, laughing and shaking his head.

And then she flips, and hits the water. Jeff laughs out loud but is interrupted when he hears a familiar voice.

"Having some fun?"

He turns around and sees Michael on a jetski. "Hey, man. What are you doing here?"

"I was just taking this bad boy out for a spin and I saw you and your girl so I thought I should say hi. Speaking of, where is she?" he asks, scanning the boat from left to right.

"Dude, you just missed her. She was here a minute ago. She went for a dive."

"Oh, that's too bad. Oh, well. I guess next time, right? I'll go now. Tell her I said hi," be says, turning the jetski around to the opposite side.

"You heading home now?"

"Yes. I'll see you tomorrow."

Jeff watches Michael drive off for a minute then he jumps into the water to find Nikita.

xxx

Jeff and Nikita sit on the sand. It has been a long, exhausting but very fun night. After they went diving, Jeff taught her how to surf. If there is one thing Jeff learned tonight about the woman he loves, is her lack of surfing skills. They sit there laughing, taking turns making jokes. Then Jeff grabs her chin to get her to look at him. "Margaret, you have no idea how happy you make me. Not just tonight but everyday. Ever since I met you, my world changed."

"Jeff, I like you and you have been nothing but a great friend to me. But-," he interrupts her.

"I know. I know what you're about to say. And trust me, I understand. I really do. And like what I said before, I am willing to wait for as long as it takes. I will never force you into doing something you are not ready for," he says, staring directly into her eyes.

Nikita can see the sincerity and vulnerability in his eyes. "I know. I believe you."

"Margaret, I know it's too much to ask, and it probably contradicts some of the things I said just a few seconds ago, but kiss me..please?" he says softly, with a slight of desperation in his tone. It almost sounded as if he was begging.

Nikita doesn't hesitate and pulls him for a slow, passionate kiss. She breaks the kiss right away, and gives Jeff a friendly hug.

"Thank you," he says, returning the hug. "Thank you for being a great friend."

"Back at you, birthday boy," she replies, teasing him.


	9. Chapter 9

Thanksgiving is coming up and as a tradition, Jeff and his family are having a dinner. Ever since he was a child, Thanksgiving dinners were always held at his grandmother's house in Maui. But since he had bought a house in Oahu a year and a half ago, the family thought it would be nice if they celebrated at Jeff's house so they could see his new home. Jeff is quite excited about this for many reasons. One, it'll give him a chance to show his new home to his family. Two, he won't have to drive a car full of food and pies, and have his car smelling like food for weeks. Because if there's one thing people did not know about him is that he is a great cook, and an amazing baker. And lastly, he will be able to bring Nikita and introduce her to his family. Eventhough they are only friends, Jeff still wants Nikita to meet his family, and he wants his grandmother to meet the woman he loves, which he talks to her about over the phone for months now.

xxx

Nikita parks her car in front of the beach. She stays inside her car and watches little kids play on the sand and play in the water. She loves watching them play. She admires their innocence, enthusiasm and love for life. She remembers her own childhood and there was nothing, not even one, beautiful thing or memory, she can recall from it. Then she remembers the dreams she had while she was still with Michael. She had found herself many times, sometimes even while in the middle of an operation, day dreaming about having children, a house with white-picket fence and a life with Michael. Now here she is, sitting in her car in the middle of nowhere, alone and with a heavy, broken heart. She lets her tears flow knowing that there is no one watching her. She looks down and focuses her eyes on her naked finger. She looks at it, pain and lonely suddenly taking over her. "Michael," she says softly, rubbing her naked ring finger. "Michael, please be strong," she says, sobbing hysterically. Then, her phone rings. She checks to see who it is and answers it.

"Hello?"

"Hi, Margaret."

"What's up, Jeff? Is everything okay?"

"Yeah, everything is fine. Are you-are you..crying?" he asks, sensing the sadness and cracking of her voice.

"No, no. I, uhm, I just woke up," she says, clearing her throat.

"Oh, okay. Uhm, as you know, it's Thanksgiving this Thursday and I would like to invite you to our family dinner. It'll be fun."

"Uhm, I don't know, Jeff."

"Please? I promise it'll be fun."

"Jeff, I don't want them to think that-" he cuts her off.

"They won't, I promise. They know you're my friend and I just don't want you to spend Thanksgiving alone at home. I'll be baking pies," he says, bribing Nikita like a child.

"Are you sure it's okay for me to come? I mean, it's a family dinner and I don't want anybody to feel awkward for having an outsider there."

"Trust me, they'd love for you to come," he assures her.

"Okay then. I'll go."

"Atta girl," he exclaims playfully.

xxx

Nikita and Jeff arrive at his home. Nikita scans the place and compliments how beautiful his home is. They enter the house and Jeff's family members are all in the living room, singing and clapping. Jeff's uncle sees the two of them and stops singing. Eveyone's heads turn in their direction and all takes their turn greeting and giving Nikita a welcoming hug. Nikita couldn't help but feel comfortable with them. All of them are nice, warm and welcoming. She can see where Jeff gets his loving attitude. Then, Jeff's grandmother comes out from the kitchen and walks up to Nikita. She gives her a hug and a kiss on the cheek. "Pleased to finally meet you, Margaret. I've heard so many great things about you," she says, glancing at his grandson.

Nikita suddenly feels shy and begins to blush. "Pleased to meet you, too, ma'am," she replies.

xxx

It's been more than 2 hours since Jeff and Nikita arrived. So far, everyone had managed to sing, play board games and swapped endless jokes and stories. It is now time to head to the dining room and have dinner. They all take their own seats, with Jeff and Nikita sitting next to each other.

"So Margaret, are you originally from here?," asks Jeff's father.

"Um, no, sir. I moved here 2 years ago."

Before they could even continue with the conversation, the door bell rings. Everyone wonders who it is considering none of them expects anyone else to come.

"Oh, that might be for me," says Jeff, getting up from his seat to get the door.

But before he could leave, Nikita grabs his hand, "Uhm, Jeff, where's the restroom? I need to go freshen up."

"Oh, go down the hall, make a left and it's the first door to your right," he says, pointing to its direction.

"Okay, thanks."

Both of them walk away at the same time. Jeff heads to the door, while Nikita heads to the restroom.

Jeff opens the door and is glad to see a familiar face.

"Hey, Michael. Glad you could make it," he says, giving his friend a hug.

"Of course, I wouldn't miss it for the world. Sorry I'm late," he replies, returning the hug.

They walk to the dining room and gives Michael a seat across from him and Nikita.

"Everyone, I want you to meet my buddy, Michael. Michael, I want you to meet my family."

"Hello, Michael. Glad you could join us," says Jeff's grandfather.

"Thanks, sir. It's my pleasure. Thanks for having me," he replies, pulling the chair out so he could sit.

A few minutes later, Nikita enters the room and heads to her seat. Michael is too busy talking to Jeff's grandfather that he doesn't notice Nikita takes a seat across from him.

"Hi. Nice to have you back," Jeff teases. "I want you to meet someone." He interrupts Michael and his grandfather, "Michael, I want you to meet Margaret."

Michael turns his head and sees Nikita. His eyes widened and he could see that Nikita is just as surprised to see him as he is. Both of them are shocked and speechless. Shocked to see each other there. Both of them stared deeply into each other's eyes, not saying anything verbally but their eyes are saying everything they want to say to one another. Michael is longing for her and he can see that she is longing for him, too. Then, Jeff breaks the silence.

"Michael, this is Margaret. And Margaret, this is the buddy I was telling you about."

"Hello, Margaret. Nice to meet you. I've heard a lot about you," he says, forcing a fake smile. If there is one thing Division had taught them is how to play a role and hide their emotions. And they do just exactly that. He extends his hand out for a shake and looks her straight in the eyes.

"Hi. Nice to meet you," she replies, shaking his hand. The touch sends shiver down her spine. It's that familiar touch she longed for, for so long. The same touch that once gave her a sense of security and assured her that she was loved. It's been two years but she could still see pain in his eyes. Sitting just a few feet from him, she could still hear his heart break, just like her heart is breaking right now into million little pieces.

They made it through dinner. The two of them kept glancing at each other. At one point, Michael asked her to pass the peas just so he could have an excuse to touch her hand. Actually, he did that several times throughout dinner and he would stare at her eyes each time, but each time Nikita looked away.

Dinner is finally over and the three of them say their goodbyes to Jeff's family. It is now just the three of them in the house. Nikita's heart is pounding so fast and so hard that it feels like as if it is going to jump out if her chest. Michael's stares and glares make her uncomfortable and make breathing difficult.

"Thanks for coming, man," Jeff says to Michael.

"Thanks for having me. Are you taking her home now?," he asks curiously.

"Yes, she looks a little tired," he replies, turning his head to Nikita's direction.

Nikita gives a fake smile, which Michael is very familiar with. He had seen that fake smile many times before, especially during missions where she had to pretend she was interested in the target, or when Percy or Amanda made her uncomfortable about certain missions.

"Then I better go now," says Michael. "It was nice to meet you, Margaret," giving Nikita a hug.

Nikita smells that familiar scent; God she misses that scent. She misses his tight embrace. "It was nice to meet you, too," she says, avoiding his glance.

xxx

Nikita just finished taking a shower. It has been a long and eventful night, one she surely will never forget. She puts on a white tank top and red boy shorts. She heads to the kitchen and grabs a bottle of water. Then, she freezes. She can feel someone is behind her, watching her every move. His presence is so strong that she could sense him near her. She turns around slowly..

"What are you doing here?"

To be continued..


	10. Chapter 10

"You know why I'm here," he says, with a mixture of sadness and anger in his tone. "To bring you home." He is happy to see Nikita but at the same time he feels betrayed and angry that she had kept him miserable all this time while she moved on to someone else and started a new life.

She had missed him so much. All she wants to do right this very second is to run to him and kiss him. But she knows better than that. She knows she needs to be tough. Even if it meant hurting his feelings and breaking his heart once again just to keep him away and safe, she would do it. "This IS my home now. You have to leave, Michael. You know you can't be here," she says, keeping her distance from him. They are standing only a few feet away from each other but it feels like as if they have the whole world standing between them.

"Why not? Because Jeff is here? Because your boyfriend will get mad?," he says angrily. She can sense how angry he is. She has heard that same angry tone one too many times before. It's the same voice she was well too familiar with back when she was still a rogue Division agent.

"Just go, Michael," she snaps. Turning her back to walk away.

"You're unbelievable, Nikita! How could you do this to me? Not only did you leave me behind without saying a word, but you moved on pretty quickly as if I meant nothing to you at all," he says, with so much pain, anger and misery in his voice.

She stops and turns back around. "Michael-," he interrupts her.

"You even..you even slept with him!" Tears threatening to fall. She has never seen him this way; so hurt, so broken.

Nikita's eyes widened. Confused on how he found out about it. Not knowing what to say, she puts her head down and focuses her eyes on the ground. She feels embarassed at what she did, and feels bad that he found out. And knowing how much he loves her, she can just imagine how painful and heartbreaking this must be for him.

"I was going crazy. Not eating, not sleeping, worrying sick about you while you were here scuba diving and fucking another man! Did you even think about me at all? Did you..did you even love me?" he says, voice shaking.

Nikita looks up at him. She can see pain in his eyes, and it hurts her to see his heartbreak in front of her. She wants it to stop. But how?

"Tell me something, Nikita. Do you love him?"

"Michael, I, uhm..," she couldn't find words to say.

"Do you love him?!" he screams, punching the wall next to him.

Nikita jumps when his fist lands on the wall. "Yes! So just please go! Far away from me! Just forget about me!," she exclaims, feeling her knees weaken. She loves Michael so much; so much more than life itself. But she knows that being with him would only put him in great danger. His love for her can cost him his life, and she cannot allow that to happen; she won't even bear it.

Michael couldn't believe what she just said. He stands there, hands start to shake. He looks at her and tries to read her eyes. Eventhough Division has trained and molded her to become a cold, emotionless person, her eyes always tell what the body and her actions try to hide. Michael could always look through her. "You're lying. You're lying, Nikita. In fact, you're missing me right now," he says, eyes still focused on her eyes.

"Stop it!," she says. "What do you want from me? Just go!" She chokes up and looks away, trying to avoid his pleading glares.

"You know what, you never should have saved me! You should have just let me die!"

With that Nikita breaks down. Her whole world shatters.

"Don't say that! Don't you dare say that, Michael!" she says, sobbing hysterically.

"Why the hell not?! I'm already dead anyway. You killed me when you decided to walk away and be with Jeff. I have nothing to live for, Nikita.," he says. His knees drop to the ground and he begins to sob. Nikita has seen him fall apart before but never like this. She's never seen him so broken.

Nikita quickly runs to him and holds his face with both her hands.

"Michael, please. Please don't say that. Look at me! Look at me!," she demands.

Michael looks up to her. He sees pain in her eyes. He sees fear, confusion and pain. Right then, right at that very moment, he knew that they were both feeling the same thing; they were both miserable without each other. He quickly grabs the back of her neck and crashes his lips onto hers. Nikita doesn't hesitate and kisses him back immediately. The kiss was full of love, need, anger, passion and lust. Their tongues are battling for dominance as they continue with the kiss. Michael lifts Nikita on her feet and quickly carries her to the nearby table. He's missed her so much, he wanted to have her right there and then. He places Nikita down on top of the table and rips her tank top off violently. He unhooks her bra and squeezes both of her breast.

"Aaahh," Nikita moans.

"That's right. I'm going to make you forget about Jeff," he says, spreading her legs wide apart. He bites her shoulder and unbuckles his belt at the same time. "You're mine, do you hear me? Mine!" He then rips her panties off and spreads her legs even wider. He is angry, rough and feeling possessive. He bites Nikita's neck, then lowers himself and bites her hip tattoo, then moves back up to her nipple, which he bites hard, as well. That made Nikita scream in both pain and pleasure.

"Ahhh! God, damn you!," she screams, throwing her head back and digging her nails deep into his flesh. The pain he inflicts on her makes her extremely aroused.

"Yeah, that's right. Scream some more. I'm going to make you forget that there was ever anyone else but me!" Then, he enters her.

"Michael," she moans.

He keeps thrusting harder and deeper. "Say my name again," he says, this time his voice is needy. "Tell me you want me!" He commands, pounding on her even harder and deeper.

"Ahhh..I-"

"Say it!" he yells, biting her lower lip.

"Ahhh. I, ah. I want you, Michael," she says breathlessly. She grabs his head to look at his face. She stares in his eyes and sees love, need and fear. She kisses him gently, "Make love to me. Touch me, please," she says, breathing heavily and sweating profusely.

With that Michael loses it. He kisses her deeply and passionately. He keeps pounding on her, deeper and harder than it was earlier. They can both feel the counter threatening to break, so Michael strongly lifts Nikita and carries her to the couch. He then turns her around and this time, enters her from behind. He enters her and burries his penis deep into her, making her scream with pleasure. He thrusts harder and deeper, making Nikita's head spin.

"Fuckkk! Michaaaaael!," she screams, reaching her orgasm. "Harder! Fuck! Ohhh! Faster!," placing both her hands on Michael's hips, guiding and forcing him to pick up his pace.

He thrusts faster and harder. He looks down to see her face and sees her falling apart. She is out of it and he knows it. She is spiraling out of control from extreme pleasure and ecstacy. He pounds into her deeper causing her to scream his name over and over again.

Hearing her scream his name is like music to his ears. He thrusts into her one more time and he reaches his own orgasm, "Oh, God! Ohh..yeaaahh. Fuck! Ohh, Nikitaaaaa!," he screams, voice echoing in the whole house. His breathing is heavy and his heart is beating fast. He collapsed on top if Nikita and the two of them are left breathless, speechless and exhausted. He stays burried in her for a few minutes before he pulls out of her. He then turns around to face her, and finds her peacefully laying next to him, breathing heavily and eyes completely shut. He couldn't help but smile, knowing that he was the one of who had put her into a peaceful state. He is well-familiar with that face. He has seen that many times before; he has seen that each and everytime they finished making love. He brushes several long strands of hair out of her face, which causes Nikita to open her eyes and turn her face to him. Michael looks into her eyes and caresses her cheek. Neither of them have the guts or the courage to say anything, but their eyes tell it all. He grabs her and holds her tight.

"I love you, Nikita."

"I love you, too, Michael."


	11. Chapter 11

The sun is shining brightly in the small window of Nikita's room. Despite of all the events that had taken place the previous night, Michael could not bring himself to sleep. He couldn't. He is afraid that if he closed his eyes, Nikita would leave him again. No, he will not let that happen again. Not this time; not ever. Instead, he lays next to her and watches her intently. He stares at her face, remembering every little feature and a smile escapes his lips as he realizes that nothing has changed; she is still as beautiful as he remembers. Nikita lays on her stomach, showing her bare back and sheet covering her lower region. God he missed her. He missed this; the sight of her naked body, sleeping peacefully next to him. He can't believe that this day would ever come. He's always been an optimistic guy but after everything he has been through these past years, he almost lost hope. But that doesn't matter anymore because she is here, by his side. He strokes her back and trail kisses on her shoulder. Surprisingly, Nikita doesn't even move. Michael couldn't help but chuckle because for all the years he's known her, Nikita has always been a light sleeper. But today, this morning, she sleeps peacefully. She has not slept like this in a very long time. She hasn't felt this secure and home in a very long time, and having Michael by her side gives her that sense of comfort and security she has been longing for.

Michael gets up from bed and walks towards the jacket laying on the wooden floor. He picks it up and reaches for the pocket. He then retrieves a tiny box; the very same tiny box he brought to Hong Kong that carried Nikita's engagement ring.

"Michael?" Nikita calls, eyes still shut.

"Shhh..I'm right here. Go back to sleep," he says, heading back to the bed.

He sits next to her still naked body and begins trailing kisses down her bare back. Nikita moans at the sensation and turns around to face Michael. She opens her eyes and sees him staring down at her with a sad look on his face. With that she immediately sits up and reaches for his face. He can see the concern in her eyes and he quickly drops his head down to avoid her gaze.

"Hey, look at me. Look at me," she says. "What's the matter?"

"Nothing."

"Michael, talk to me. Please," she pleads.

"I just..I just don't want this moment to end. I don't want to wake up one morning and-" she puts her index finger on his lips.

"Shh..that will never happen again," she assures him.

Michael's eyes light up and grabs Nikita's face with both hands. He kisses her so gently and passionately, then he pulls the tiny box from behind and takes out the shiny ring. Nikita suddenly becomes emotional at the sight of the ring. She has missed that ring and never thought she'll ever see it again, let alone wear it.

"Oh, Michael," she says, voice cracking.

"Nikita, will you-"

He doesn't even get the chance to finish the question. Nikita quickly crashes her lips into his. Without breaking the kiss, Michael expertly slips the ring to Nikita's finger. She pulls him down with her on the bed.

She pulls away and both of them stare at each others' eyes.

"Make love to me," she says, eyes still fixed on Michael's.

Michael closes his eyes and kisses her again, only this time, the kiss is full of love, need and passion. He breaks the kiss and looks right into her eyes. He caresses her cheek with his left hand and stroking her hair with the right. Nikita looks right at him in return. They stare at each other for a while. They didn't speak but their eyes tell it all. Although words are not spoken, they know exactly what the other is thinking and feeling. And with that, Michael pulls Nikita's chin and kisses her on the lips.

"Make love to me, Michael" she says breathlessly. "Hold me, please."

Michael responds by parting Nikita's legs, and quickly positioning himself at her entrance. He looks up at her and sees her watching him with so much love and passion.

"Michael, please" she pleads, eyes still fixed on his.

He enters her and both of them freeze and throw their heads back, then he pulls back Nikita's head to look in her eyes. "Say my name, Nikita," he says, breathing heavily. "I want to hear you say it. Please."

Nikita feels a sudden rush of guilt. She knows why Michael wants her to say his name. She knows he still pictures her in bed with Jeff and she knows that those thoughts are eating him up inside and driving him crazy.

"Michael," she finally says, almost out of breath. She tries so hard to focus on Michael, fighting so hard not to lose herself in this feeling of extreme pleasure and bliss.

Michael smiles but still not quite satisfied. He pushes in and out, then stops.

"Michael, don't.." Nikita says.

"Tell me I'm still the one," he says, eyes begging for her to tell him, to reassure him.

Nikita grabs his face, "Michael, it's still you. It's always been you. What happened-That, that was a mistake."

With that he crashes his lips onto hers. He continues thrusting and moaning her name, and Nikita calls his name in return. Then they hear a sudden knock on the door. Both of them suddenly stop, and Nikita pushes Michael off of her. She carefully takes a peek out the window and sees Jeff carrying some coffee and croissant.

"Oh, damn!" she says quietly to herself.

"Why? Who is it?"

"Uhm. It's-"

"Jeff?" he asks annoyingly.

Nikita nods her head and she can see Michael's irritation and jealousy.

"You gotta go," she says, her head down, avoiding his gaze.

"What?" he asks in disbelief.

"He can't see us here together. Michael, please? Don't make this harder than it already is. I promise I will fix this."

"Nikita-"

"Please?"

Jeff continues to knock on the door. "Margaret, it's me. The most handsome man on this island."

"Coming, Jeff. Give me a minute," she yells back.

She pushes Michael towards the back door. "Go, now."

She kisses him on the lips and he uses this opportunity to grab her. He grabs her, kisses her with deep passion and lust, and slams her body down the dining table. The loud crash makes Jeff worry.

"Margaret! Are you okay?" he yells from just outside the door.

Panting heavily and catching her breath, "Yes, I'm fine. Give me a minute!"

They continue making out. Nikita wants to push Michael off of her but couldn't seem to stop. She wants this; wants him.

Michael wastes no time. He lifts Nikita's shirt so aggresively and passionately, not caring that Jeff could barge in any minute. He then moves on to her panties. He removes them and throws them across the room.

"Hey! Don't-" Nikita tries to protest but Michael catches her lips again.

He enters her and begin pounding her hard and fast. Nikita's head is spinning. God she is so aroused; more aroused that she was the previous night. What they're doing right now, right here, is out of pure lust and thrill. He keeps pounding, harder, faster and deeper, and within seconds, Nikita reaches orgasm.

Michael looks down and sees Nikita falling apart. He knows that look. He has seen it many times before. And before she even has the chance to scream, Michael places his hand over her mouth to silence her. He felt her scream under his palm and he is very pleased with her reaction. A few more thrusts and he follows. And this time, it is Nikita's turn to cover his mouth.

Michael gets off of her with a victorious smirk on his face.

"Get that smirk off your face," she says smiling. "Now tell me, where the hell is my underwear?"

"I'll let Jeff find it," he teases, making his way to the door. "I'll see you tonight."

Nikita closes the door and straightens herself up. She walks towards the front door and opens it.

"Hi. Sorry for the wait."

"Coffee?"


End file.
